Here at Bridebook, we’re on a mission to make the wedding planning journey as joyful as possible for all engaged couples. That means every couple, everywhere. Every couple should be able to share their love and commitment with the world in whatever way they want. But with so much advice still influenced by heteronormative wedding traditions, it can be hard to work out how your wedding is going to unfold. That’s why we’ve put together a few top tips to help you rip up the rulebook and plan the celebration of the century.
First up, let’s talk finding your venue. For any couple, this is almost always one of the very first steps in the wedding planning process. So if you’re an LGBTQ+ couple looking for your perfect match, where should you start? Well, we can recommend Chapel House Estate in Kent, Ashdown Park Hotel & Country Club in East Sussex, The Wellbeing Farm in Greater Manchester, Tredudwell Manor in Cornwall and Ox Pasture Hall in North Yorkshire as just a few fabulous venues that foreground their support of the LGBTQ+ community.
But if none of those are for you, The Wellbeing Farm suggests paying close attention to “the way the staff speak to you and ask what you want in your wedding. If they treat you like any other couple, then you know you’ve got a venue with your [best] interests at heart.” Your venue’s staff, as well as the rest of your wedding suppliers, will be a huge part of your big day – so it’s important to make sure you feel completely supported by them.
We’d also recommend finding a venue which, like Chapel House Estate and The Wellbeing Farm, is ready to be as flexible as possible when it comes to you as a couple and what you want for your wedding. After all, one of the best things about an LGBTQ+ wedding is the complete freedom you have to design your perfect day – so make sure to take advantage of this!
Want to put your own spin on some or all of the traditions of heterosexual weddings? Go for it! Why not make up your own names for the members of your wedding party – no “best man” or “maid of honour” needed! And if you want “traditional” wedding photography, you might want to think about finding a photographer who specialises in LGBTQ+ weddings. They’ll know exactly how to adapt all the poses for you and your partner – and, most importantly, be able to make you both feel at ease in front of the camera.
Equally, you could ditch all the traditions and do your own thing instead! At your reception, you might want to abandon traditional seating arrangements and mix up the order in which the speeches are given. And if you don’t feel like you need to be “given away”, consider walking down the aisle alone, with a friend – or even with your partner. The Wellbeing Farm told us about one wedding they hosted where “the couple vogued down the aisle to RuPaul and had a drag queen in the evening” – while at another, there were “Star Wars character walking around!”
For us here at Bridebook, we feel honoured to work in an industry that celebrates love – whatever form it comes in. And, as The Wellbeing Farm explains, this should be the case across the wedding industry where inclusivity is “not just relevant, it’s crucial. Ultimately, who gives a fig who loves who? Person A loves Person B, and they want to spend the rest of their lives with each other. Love doesn’t discriminate – so why should anyone else?”
We couldn’t have put it better ourselves. ❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜