Couple's Survey 2017

Last updated: 5th Mar 2019


For National Couples Day,, the free wedding planning app and website, has surveyed 7,000 couples to find out what being a modern couple really entails. Revealing some fascinating insights demonstrating a move even further away from archaic male and female ‘roles’, the results show how the gender divide is diminishing in an apparent way right from the very beginning of a relationship through to the wedding day and beyond. Couples answered questions about their ‘emotional roles’ in relation to dating, proposals and their wedding day, and their attitude to money, socialising and day to day chores.

This study was across both same sex and straight couples, however when male/female comparisons have been made only heterosexual relationships have been considered.




It is no longer always down to the man to make the first move:

  • 62% of couples said that the man made the first move
  • 29% of couples said that the woman made the first move
  • 9% of couples said that neither made the first move.



Once in a relationship, men are sharing their feelings first:

  • 63% of couples said that the man said ‘I Love You’ first
  • 61% of couples claimed they both say ‘I Love You’ more than twice/day
  • 21% of couples claimed they both say ‘I Love You’ more than five times/day
  • 58% of couples claimed they both say ‘I Love You’ to each other within three months of being together
  • 37% of couples say the man and woman are equally romantic.



Women are not afraid of initiating taking the ‘next step’, and couples are splitting the costs of living:

  • 63% said the man brought up becoming “official” first
  • 43% said they initiated sharing keys at the same time (31% woman first, 27% man first)
  • 53% of couples said the woman met the man’s family first
  • 56% of couples believe they own half of each other’s monthly income
  • 73% of couples split their house purchase cost equally
  • 70% of couples split rental costs equally
  • 67% of couples share a bank account.



Popping the question is not always left to the man, and both men and women find it hard to hide their emotions:

  • The man proposed in 87% of couples
  • The women proposed in 4% of couples
  • 9% said neither the man/woman proposed, it was a mutual decision
  • 88% of women admitted to crying at the proposal
  • 19% of men admitted to crying at the proposal



Planning a wedding is no longer left to the bride, and men are becoming increasingly emotionally involved:

  • 62% of wedding planning decisions were made by the man and woman together
  • 77% of those surveyed who attended a wedding show went with their partner
  • 95% of women said that they cried on their wedding day
  • 65% of men said that they cried on their wedding day
  • 84% of couples said they would do marriage counselling if the need arose.



  • 64% of couples say the daily house chores are shared equally
  • 42% of couples say the man is messier around the house (30% the woman, 28% equal)
  • 32% of men claim to do more of the cooking. 48% of women claim to do more of
  • the cooking. 20% said they cook equally
  • 88% of couples maintain a social life separate from their partner.


Hamish Shephard, founder of, says:

The Couple’s Survey 2017 offers valuable insights into how couples perceive one another’s role in a relationship. The key learning is that couples are finding their own balance and their own unique way of making the relationship work best for them, from the outest.

It is fascinating to see that men and women, who once experienced social pressure to carry out certain roles in the relationship and the home, are now more open to sharing responsibilities and to showing emotions. Life is viewed as an equal playing field and a less rigid line between the parts played is making way for the ‘modern man’ and ‘modern woman’, which should be celebrated. Archaic stereotypes are factually no longer true.”



Notes To Editor: is the UK’s leading wedding planning app and website with over 40,000 couples currently planning their wedding on the platform.

Launched in 2016,‘s state-of-the-art wedding planning toolkit with personalised Checklist, Budgeter and Guestlist manager, enables couples to plan their entire wedding from any device, anytime, anywhere, all in one place…for free.  With over 70,000 venues and suppliers in its directory, increases the digital presence of industry professionals and connects them directly with local couples.  Bridebook has also partnered with leading brands such as Mary Berry, Bobbi Brown and Jimmy Choo to provide genuine expert advice and inspiration to its couples. was founded by Hamish Shephard, an industry professional and recently married groom who used to plan his own May 2016 wedding. Visit online and on the iTunes App Store.